So, I know I haven't written anything in months!
I know I'm at fault, cause I was doing absolutely nothing, but I was sort of lost.
Well, I've graduated!
Given my finals, won a few awards at the ceremony, and now, I'm officially,as they say, "A FREE BIRD".
But, as much as I've been looking forward to this freedom, I did actually spend the last few months wondering what I'm going to do after I get done with the whole college routine.
Yes, apparently, with freedom, comes a whole bunch of responsibilities.
And, these responsibilities tend to overwhelm you with fear, joy, happiness, excitement, anxiety, and other strong emotions.
And, what's the best way to get away from all these overwhelming emotions ?
A DETOX SESSION.
So, what did I do?
Caught a plane, and went to the south. I decided to go alone, because I needed time to deal with these feelings.
I went back to the place where I grew up - Wellington.
You see, when you visit your past, not only do you remember who you were, but you see how much you've grown.
You get time, to let go of the appearance you display to the world. Here, it's just you, and your solidarity.
And, when you're alone, your thoughts can either kill you, or strengthen you.
I went to wellington. Woke up every morning at 7, and went for a run.
As much as I loved the greenery and the gorgeous sunlight, the fluffy clouds that looked like they were about to blanket you, I realized I was scared.
And this was my way of escaping reality. It was as if, when I was at wellington, the entire world had stopped. I literally, didn't have any communication other than the people who were present in wellington itself.
And everytime, something unpleasant happened, I'd put on my shoes, and walk out of my house.
You see, everyone has a way of releasing their anger, or frustration, or fear.
Some choose violence, some choose punching a bag, or a wall, or a person, some choose the gym, some choose aimlessly wandering in the woods. And that is exactly what I did.
I walked into every wood I could locate (I saw marvelous bisons as well!)
But, in all the time that I spent walking, I figured out what it was that was making me fear these responsibilities.
Having lost my childhood early, made me realize that I took on responsibilities earlier, and that I wasn't scared of it, I was just unhappy. A part of me, is still the 18 year old brat, but a part of me knows, I can never be that 18 year old again.
And, there it was. I figured it out.
And then, I realized I had to let go. I went to a cliff, that overlooked a gorgeous valley, and surrendered.
I believe in fate.
I had nothing to be worried about. I let go of all my worries and fears, and sorrow.
And then, I felt light. I felt like I was a cloud, floating, because I was light.
It's then that I realized, Life can get tough, it can get rough, it can get you down, and it can rub your face into the ground. But, you just need to release it, and let go.
For me, it's wellington. The place I feel free, and feel I can let go and get back to normal.
There, I'm not answerable for my actions. I just aimlessly wander off. It's a place where I can reconnect not only with nature, but with myself.
They say, you lose a part of yourself, everytime you meet someone.
And, the only way I could regain myself, was to spend endless amounts of time, with me.
Bantering about the past, eagerly waiting for the future, living in the presnt.
This is my detox place. This is my yearly medicine. This is the place I feel rejuvenated.
And, my selfie game is totally on point there!
Stay blessed, stay happy. Find your detox place, and let go!
I know I'm at fault, cause I was doing absolutely nothing, but I was sort of lost.
Well, I've graduated!
Given my finals, won a few awards at the ceremony, and now, I'm officially,as they say, "A FREE BIRD".
But, as much as I've been looking forward to this freedom, I did actually spend the last few months wondering what I'm going to do after I get done with the whole college routine.
Yes, apparently, with freedom, comes a whole bunch of responsibilities.
And, these responsibilities tend to overwhelm you with fear, joy, happiness, excitement, anxiety, and other strong emotions.
And, what's the best way to get away from all these overwhelming emotions ?
A DETOX SESSION.
So, what did I do?
Caught a plane, and went to the south. I decided to go alone, because I needed time to deal with these feelings.
I went back to the place where I grew up - Wellington.
You see, when you visit your past, not only do you remember who you were, but you see how much you've grown.
You get time, to let go of the appearance you display to the world. Here, it's just you, and your solidarity.
And, when you're alone, your thoughts can either kill you, or strengthen you.
I went to wellington. Woke up every morning at 7, and went for a run.
As much as I loved the greenery and the gorgeous sunlight, the fluffy clouds that looked like they were about to blanket you, I realized I was scared.
And this was my way of escaping reality. It was as if, when I was at wellington, the entire world had stopped. I literally, didn't have any communication other than the people who were present in wellington itself.
And everytime, something unpleasant happened, I'd put on my shoes, and walk out of my house.
You see, everyone has a way of releasing their anger, or frustration, or fear.
Some choose violence, some choose punching a bag, or a wall, or a person, some choose the gym, some choose aimlessly wandering in the woods. And that is exactly what I did.
I walked into every wood I could locate (I saw marvelous bisons as well!)
But, in all the time that I spent walking, I figured out what it was that was making me fear these responsibilities.
Having lost my childhood early, made me realize that I took on responsibilities earlier, and that I wasn't scared of it, I was just unhappy. A part of me, is still the 18 year old brat, but a part of me knows, I can never be that 18 year old again.
And, there it was. I figured it out.
And then, I realized I had to let go. I went to a cliff, that overlooked a gorgeous valley, and surrendered.
I believe in fate.
I had nothing to be worried about. I let go of all my worries and fears, and sorrow.
And then, I felt light. I felt like I was a cloud, floating, because I was light.
It's then that I realized, Life can get tough, it can get rough, it can get you down, and it can rub your face into the ground. But, you just need to release it, and let go.
For me, it's wellington. The place I feel free, and feel I can let go and get back to normal.
There, I'm not answerable for my actions. I just aimlessly wander off. It's a place where I can reconnect not only with nature, but with myself.
They say, you lose a part of yourself, everytime you meet someone.
And, the only way I could regain myself, was to spend endless amounts of time, with me.
Bantering about the past, eagerly waiting for the future, living in the presnt.
And, my selfie game is totally on point there!
Stay blessed, stay happy. Find your detox place, and let go!
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