Daddykins

We all look up to our parents. Girls to their dads,& boys to their moms. It's some kind of universal law. 

I'm a daddy's girl. For him,I'd still be the little baby who was crying when she was born. The girl who he taught how to ride a bike,to drive a car, to write cursive. 

What we don't realize is, 'those who are closest to us,make the most painful yet impactful effect on us.' 

So,I recently made a huge mistake that I'm not very proud of. My mom tried talking to me for about 2-3hours. Didn't make a difference. 

The next morning,all it took was dads 3 sentences to make me burst into tears. 

Sometimes,the ones closest to us, can also make or break us;For we are most vulnerable to the ones who know everything about us. 

This morning (5/7/13),as I dropped dad off at the airport,he made a very mean statement regarding my capability.  

I was hurt. I shut my mouth. Looked out of the window,and a tear rolled out. 

You know,when you look up to someone,their opinion about you matters the most. And you won't believe it, as I type this, I have tears in my eyes. 

When you're looked down upon by the world, it might make a slight difference. But,when that one person you look up to, looks down at you with nothing to be proud of;believe me, it's worse than death. 

I don't really know how to tackle it. But I'm doing the best I can. 

Trying to gain the respect of someone you look up to keeps taking longer than u think. But it's worth it. Long. But worth it. 

All you need is some determination and some way of  being able to make them proud. 

My dad may never admit the fact that he's disappointed with the person I've grown up to be. But  I'm trying to become better. 

As simple plan rightly sang,-' cuz we lost it all, nothing lasts forever. I'm sorry in can't be perfect. Now it's just too late. And we can't go back,I'm sorry, I can't be, perfect'. 

Here too, this song is dedicated to a father. 

But yeah. I have faith, I have time. I'm just  going through a growing, tumbling, falling ,rolling, getting up and running phase. 

I'll make it through.